One point that the author Ms. Whoopie makes is the expectations we place on relationships, in particular when you call something a marriage. It presupposes you’re going to be with someone for life and therefore creates fears and actions and reactions that could be avoided. She clarifies that these are her ideas and reflections on these experiences and should by no means be taken as rule. She is owning and sharing the influences that caused some of the ill-advised decisions she’s made in love.
She goes on to discuss how pop culture has influences how we see and experience relationships. It influences and shapes ideas about love and relationships and she includes a list of songs that were popular and influential to her and the meaning of their lyrics. She asks the reader to list at least 7-10 love songs that they fell in love with when they were younger and built their expectations upon, which probably ultimately led to disappointment. She does this exercise again with popular movies. (There will be a follow-up blog post working on this exercise and sharing findings based on direct textual information.)
Whoopie’s biggest problem is that she has always been in love with being in love. We need to stop holding on to these archetypes of the romantic hero and the damsel in distress. If you’re not willing to do the work, don’t get into a relationship.
She concludes with discussing that all couples should get a prenuptial agreement no matter what, meaning no matter your economic situation or what you think your trappings are worth. Family always comes first and you should be able to complete yourself.